7 Ways to Say ‘No’

Everyone knows that being too assertive is no good. But being too shy can also cause some difficulties. In a present day world confident people get better positions and communicate more successfully. The age when women had to be shy, modest and silent passed long ago. But what to do if shyness is your natural characteristic? Though it’s not a negative peculiarity shyness can make you stay in the shadow of your friends and colleagues. Avoiding new contacts can prevent you from doing your best at work and showing your skills.

Anyway it is easier to overcome the natural shyness than cope with assertiveness. So what are the advantages of being shy? First of all you will for sure have less enemies. You may avoid some unpleasant situations just because you’re too shy to say a word.

Now let us consider all the disadvantages. Other people may use your inability to reject them. They probably will be grateful to you, but will you be grateful to yourself? Try to say a firm “no” for a couple of times and you’ll see that it doesn’t require too much effort. Gradually you will understand that a polite rejection is not a difficult thing to do. Don’t dwell on the thought that other people to be upset. Saying “no” is quite normal and most of the people take rejections easy. If you still find it difficult try to find the adequate reason which will be an obstacle for saying “yes”.

  • Don’t give your answer immediately. Maybe while you’re considering all pros and cons someone else say “yes”. Try to say that you’re waiting for a call and then give a definite answer.
  • Remember the unpleasant situation connected with the person who is asking you to do something. Then your brain will switch to the attack mode.if you’re attacking it’s easier for you to say “no”.

  • Cut the conversation off. Pretend that you have an important business, left your purse at your friend’s place or need to go to the bathroom. Use the pause and take measures to give a negative answer.
  • Suggest to ask another person. Maybe he or she will do that better. Make the person who is asking you to search for the reason why it is necessary to ask you.
  • Tell the person who is constantly asking you to do this and that how may problems you have. It always takes much effort to ask a weaker person to do something for you.

  • Take a turn to ask something for yourself. It would be great that if you know for certain that fulfilling your request is totally impossible.
  • Say that you don’t have enough experience to meet the expectations.

The main thing is to remain calm and cope with your emotions in each situation. Make the person who asks you to do something see that the reasons for your rejection don’t depend on you.

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